How to approach anal with women

I have been a fan of anal since the one time a female has let me try. However, since then I’ve been told by other women who normally do it that I’m too big for anal. Is there anything I could suggest that might make it easier?

Do you mean too thick or too long? Also what kind of warm up and what type of lube are you using? A lot of prep work can make the experience more enjoyable, because folks can’t just jump right into anal sex. Working the way up with smaller toys and plugs is a great option. Also once you do all that, if depth and length is an issue, having a wearable that helps put a barrier and control depth of penetration can help too. Ohnut has a great one (although caveat, haven’t used it for anal personally): Ohnut Custom Penetration Depth Buffer | Spectrum Boutique

And some folks just aren’t fans. But working up slowly and gradually is the best way to go.

Oh! I forgot the Ohnut came out with an updated version that comes in a bigger size as well! Ohnut Rainbow Custom Penetration Depth Buffer | Spectrum Boutique

Length. Girth I would say is average, with a large tip, and 9 inches long. I have used fingers and small toys along with lube, but after any penetration from me, they say it hurts before I get any significant amount of depth.

Gotcha. Fingers and small toys and then right into 9 inches is still a pretty big jump for someone to take. An anal training kit like this one (we have a bunch of different types on our site) would be a good work up. That said, a lot of these kits still only go up to about 5-6inches in length. But it’s a good start, and then graduate to a bigger toy with a base after getting comfortable. It’s going to be slow and gradual increase for most folks who have a larger partner. And lots of lube (of course) will help as well.

I’ve also noticed getting vibrating toys or even just holding a traditional wand toy against the base of a plug can relax the body more as well. It’s all about comfort, and that just can take some time and practice. And using something like the Ohnut that I mentioned above is still something I’d check out.

Also at the end of the day, it just isn’t some folks thing. But if a partner is willing to try and game, gradual increase is the best way to work up size.

I will look into those. Is this an issue you have experienced yourself and that helped? Or just what you have been told by others?

Both. I’ve had friends I’ve discussed anal with, and it’s always a mixed bag who is and isn’t a fan, and sharing tips for size and comfort has always been a common talking point. But learning how to slowly build up tolerance of size is something I’ve learned directly with my partner with strap-on play.

Should I use dildos to help my partner work up to 9 inches?

I was in a relationship with someone who was quite pushy about anal. I have medical issues and it was very painful for me.
He was probably just under 7 inches and not super girthy.
We tried fingers and plugs and dildos for over a year, and at the end of the day… i just didnt like it. He kept saying, “there HAS to be a way for you to like it. We gotta keep trying.” And there just wasn’t.

Im just a big advocate for talking to your partners. Ask what they’re comfortable with and what they are willing to try, and if its too much… it may just be too much.