The nice thing about play parties that are in an already established community is that consent is key, and so is safety. So you can go and just hang out in a common area and chat and that’s ok, but also there is a ton of communication so if someone does want to engage with you in more there is a lot of checking in with you, and you can say stop whenever. You set your terms, and you (assuming it’s with an established group in a safe environment) are able to stop whenever. To me, if with the right group, it seems more communicative vs. casual dating.
Yeah, I would research play parties or kink groups near you. Another great way to find safe groups is checking with local or biggest city near you sex shops that have a community around them. Here in Chicago there is a feminist ran sex store that offers intro to bdsm, sex for survivor, beginner classes at their store. They are super inclusive, and a lot of the folks that work there are active in the local scene. So finding guidance from someone already involved is great! I’d also encourage for safety reasons to look for groups that want you to attend a social, nonsexual event and essentially vet you before attending any formal parties. Personally I think that weeds out any spaces where I wouldn’t feel safe, and also breaks personal stress and tension before attending an event.