Hi, all- I’m needing a bit of help here. I am v new to the sex toy game, and just as new to masturbation. It’s never really been “my thing”, and I think that’s multi-fold. First of all, I have a lot of sexual trauma and also a lot of shame around sexuality (working on it) and so it’s hard for me to orgasm, no matter the situation. I feel like I get close, but then it’s like “oh i’m close” and it’s gone as soon as i realize it. I get pretty close with a suction/ vibrator/ dildo combo toy that I bough and LOVE, but not quite there. Additionally, when i do orgasm it’s generally from very deep penetration with a very long and girthy penis, and that’s a little harder to come by.
So, what I would really love any input regarding maybe a toy recommendation that is … substantial in size, let’s say. Or possibly some suggestions on how to not need such deep penetration.
I would love to be able to reclaim my orgasm on my own, if possible.
Hey Zoe, welcome to the Forum! Just wanted to let you know I’m checking with our team and looking into some different toy options, and will get back to you shortly with some picks!
You mentioned a combo toy that you love. What specifically do you love about it? Trying to also pinpoint if a vibe would work best or maybe a dildo (which those can be easier to come by when it comes to bigger sizes).
Welcome! I would start by looking at some book around shame. There are a bunch of options and finding one that speaks to you is the best place to start. Because if you’ve found a way you like to orgasm fighting against it is only going to make it harder. I also love deep penetration and girthy toys and there’s absolutely nothing wrong with that! I also know it’s easier said then done with being totally ok with it, and it’s totally fine with being on a journey to being cool with it. The Maverick is a fave because it’s dual density so it’s feel pretty realistic and has a nice pronounced head. Depending on your size preference other ones to check out are the MarshmallowGambler and Champion. The most important thing to keep in mind is don’t get discouraged if it doesn’t work for you because the only way to know is to try things out!
Hi! Thank you for the response and support- so nice not to feel judged in this discussion. The tricky part is that I think the best part of my toy for me is the vibration, and how it gets amplified by the thrusting of the dildo part, so it’s kind of this suction action. But maybe if it were larger i’d get more pleasure form it. I was looking at the suction dildos that you can stick to a surface…
I will say with my partner using a dildo that is thicker then using a wand against the base to add in vibration has been great too. There are def. ways to modify a few toys to get what you want.