SSRIs & sex drive

Hey y’all,
I’ve started taking an ssri & concerned about loosing the ability to orgasm, that’s where I get all the natural serotonin my brain can scrape together and a top 10 activity.
Has anyone been able to combat this? I’m a vulva owner if that changes things. I’ve been reading about CBD lubes, does anyone have experience in this and if so, any affordable suggestions?


I’ve been on and off SSRIs (and similar meds like Effexor) a few times over the past ~18 years and I am also someone with a vulva.

My experience has been that SSRIs mess up my ability to orgasm when I first start taking them, but that eventually (after a few months) it slowly comes back. I’m not entirely sure what the mechanism is or what’s going on biologically to make it come back and I’m not sure this happens for everyone. Some people have luck with switching to a different medicine or scaling back their dose, but time has been the only thing that works for me.

When I was struggling with this a few years ago, someone suggested to me that aiming for g-spot or cervical orgasms might be easier, and I found that I had the most success with what I think are cervical (or a-spot) orgasms. My go-to masturbation technique has always been something inside me (usually a silicone dildo) and a hitachi magic wand on my clit, but for awhile the only thing that worked was an njoy pure wand, specifically the small end. They aren’t generally considered to hit the right spot for cervical orgasms but it definitely hits a different spot than what I was hitting before with the larger end of the njoy or with a dildo. There’s some info about them here: Cervical orgasms and stimulation: a BS-free to the deep erogenous zones - Super Smash Cache

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Hey hey. I’m in the same boat - vulva, daily SSRIs, frustration and worry. I’m actually mostly asexual but with a plethora of anxiety disorders I rely on solo masturbation to cope with the world around me in order to relax and sleep. Weirdly enough my libido is waaay up, but SSRIs are killing my sensation and ability to orgasm. I’ve been on 10mgs Escitalopram for about a year and it’s been getting fuzzier and fuzzier. Not in a good way. :<

I am planning to talk to a doctor about it (my family doc has been awol since November 2019 and her temp replacement is A coldish dude :confused: ), so I haven’t found anything to work through it, but I’ve been reading a lot, and the repeated mantra is that this is a thing that can happen, may or may not last a long time, and may get better with a few things with rocky studies:

  • Exercise (and since the fall I’ve been slackin);
  • Eat well;
  • Supplements (talk to a doc first), there are lists of recommendations out there;
  • Mental readjusting (it’s about the journey, not the destination, just explore and enjoy, don’t set high standards, etc);
  • Be kind to yourself - like extra extra kind;
  • Don’t hold back on Or feel ashamed of doubling down on what you enjoy when it comes to getting in the mood
  • Remind yourself this isn’t the end of the road for your sex life, even if you stay on your meds or your libido doesn’t rush back.

Knowing there’s some light has been helpful to me! I’m also planning a huuuuuge like four-figure splurge across 2021 and introducing a lot of new things to the bedroom. It’s self-care for me and my partner lol. an investment if you will.

Good luck. I feel you on this. It sucks, :<


Echoing what someone said about trying g-spot stimulation, I’ve had friends on SSRIs and clitoral stimulation is nada for them but g-spot is a different sensation and deeper and with practice and time is something that works for them.

And Skull has such wonderful advice, it’s truly about the journey and not the destination, and it’s not the end of the road for your sex life if it’s something you’re struggling with now. Not SSRI related, but I have a chronic hormone condition that tanks my sex drive sometimes. So it will go through periods of really ebbing and flowing. I have to remind myself a lot that sometimes my body just isn’t going to orgasm, but I can still touch it and enjoy it and give it love and it feels good, there doesn’t have to be an end goal. And how it feels in those periods when it’s low, they aren’t forever, and I try and use those moments to explore new sensations or toys or things to see how or if my body reacts to those. I try to take the moments that are frustrating as a time to be curious and explore, that helps me not hyperfocus on my low libido.